doubled_speed | For Wearingthestars

I wish I wasn't alone.

The words were whispered from inside the relative safety of the tiny closet in Tommy Shepherd's bedroom in Springfield, New Jersey. Whispered because there was no way that he wanted Frank or Mary, fighting in the living room, shouting and screaming, to hear them.

I wish I wasn't alone.

Repeated as Tommy held his hands out before him in the darkness palms up. He put as much conviction behind them as he put into anything he said starting with those two words. He had found rather quickly that whatever this power of his was, it came more readily when he framed it as a wish.

I wish I wasn't alone.

He repeated a third time. Three times always seemed to be the right amount when it came to willfully using his power. Even now he could see the faint green glow of energy radiating from his hands, trying to catch his words and shape them into whate he was asking for. At school he didn't always need it three times. He could feel the energy building in his gut like a tidal wave and crashing over him when he wished the bullies would leave him alone, or that he'd actually gotten a good grade so Mary wouldn't yell at him, or that the shirt that got torn up and bloody was clean so Frank wouldn't hit him for wasting good clothes.

Now, though, the words didn't seem to catch, and after a moment of held breath, the energy faded back, leaving behind only the briefest flash of sparks and static that he had to shake out of his hands. Apparently even magic, or whatever this was, couldn't help him.

It was a stupid wish, anyway, Tommy realized as he pulled his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. And then, of course, he flinched at the sound of a breaking plate. They were getting bad tonight. He didn't want to be alone, not with them shouting like that. Sometimes it turned into Frank driving off to drink. Sometimes Mary stormed to their room and locked the door, leaving Frank on the couch. The former tended to mean Frank not coming home at all that night, and when he did the next day he smelled like booze and some other woman's perfume. The latter tended to mean Tommy couldn't sneak some breakfast in the kitchen before school, or being caught if he tried and he really didn't want to be on the receiving end of Frank's belt.

“Dammit. All I wanted was someone to talk to.”

He feels the rush of power even as he feels his body go limp and the world go dark around him. It’s a strange mix between a sneeze and passing out. When the sensation passes things are weird. For one thing, he can’t feel his body. There isn’t the cold of his room or the rough drag of his scratchy wool sweater that is too small for him or even the gnawing in his belly. No, there is just the swelling feeling of his magic, a prickly energy across his skin, and this place.

This new place is nicer than his room. There is more space. There are nerdy decorations on the wall. There are no cracks anywhere or dents from fists or broken furniture. He hates seeing how much nicer this place is than his home. But he is more interested in why his magic brought him here. And in the soft green light everything around him seems bathed in. Tommy raises his hand, or maybe just the concept of a hand, and is faced with the scary truth. His whole body is green and transparent. Okay. That is a bit weirder than normal.

Welcome, Tommy Shepherd, to the world of astral projection. And Billy Kaplan? Meet the strange, glowing ghostly boy in your room.

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Billy gives a surprised laugh of his own, squeezing Tommy tighter and eyes sneaking back up to Teddy.

"Yeah. Exactly And you have Teddy too," he offers.

He has Teddy? The guy doesn't know what to say.

But Teddy gets to his feet and joins the hug too. See, nice big arms around you.

Teddy's really the best, and Billy shares a grateful look with him, stealing a quick kiss while he's close. He's knows it's not fair. Both of them are hurting, and Teddy's so quick to offer this comfort to someone else, while Billy's barely gotten the chance to give it to him.

"...Everything's going to be okay."

Nothing, Tommy thinks, is going to be okay. Not even remotely. He probably doesn't actually belong to the family that wants him, and if he does, maybe he magicked them into being real. Nothing is good, nothing is...

"Ooof!" Tommy groans as Teddy's arms close tightly around them. "Geez, did you decided to date the Hulk or something?"

"Hulkling," Teddy corrects, amusement in his voice. "And I asked him out first, so I think he was more reacting."

Billy laughs softly, and that easy smile returns to his face. "Mmm, and he's really good with my brothers, so obviously he's going to love you too," he assures, flashing a teasing grin, "Gotta get all those good boyfriend points."

"Dude, you're dating a guy that calls himself Hulkling?" Tommy mumbles.

"Yeah, well, you're going to have to deal with all of that," Teddy smiles, shaking his head.

"What? It's cute," Billy counters with a fond smile.

"So...that didn't go super well," he summarized for Teddy's benefit, "And I may have argued with Cap, so...that's a thing."

"You argued with Cap?" Teddy asks as he releases them.

"I mean," Tommy sighs. "My mom insulted us."

Billy nods, looking a bit sheepish even though he was sure he was in the right this one time. "He's still kind of on the fence about what to do with Tommy, even after hearing all the things she said, and...I couldn't help it."

"How can he?" Teddy asks, voice sharp. "That's horrible!"

Tommy just shrugs. "She's always hated me."

"The...law or something," Billy mumbles, and...okay, it sounds a little more petulant on his end out of context, but if the law says he has to go back then the law is wrong.

"I'm not letting him put you back there. And neither are Mom and Dad. I'll fight Captain America, I don't even care."

There are definitely legal processes things have to go through. That everyone has to go through. But that's something else to be considered entirely.

"Billy," Teddy says in shock. He definitely knows where Cap ranks on Billy's hears.

"It's fine," Tommy says softly. "It's all fine."

Billy gives Teddy a quick reassuring look. He's not literally prepared to go to blows with him. Probably. But he is prepared to defy him, and give plenty of withering glares.

"Just because he's awesome doesn't mean he's right."

And to Tommy, "It's not fine."

Tommy shrugs and pulls away, wrapping his arms around himself.

"Frank will be worse. I don't want to see him at all."

"You don't have to," Billy assures, trying to speak as though he has any authority over what happens next. At the end of the day there's very little he can do apart from actually kidnapping him so they can't make him. His parents though, if they come through they can intervene. Or if Cap reflects on how traumatizing that last attempt was and comes to his senses.

"Then... maybe we should do something?" Teddy suggests. He frowns thoughtfully. There has to be something else he can do to help with this. And he needs to not think too much. "There's an arcade we could do that for a while."

Tommy frowns. He's never been before.

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